You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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