I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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