We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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