So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
