Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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