I saw his package. It spoke to me.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
