i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
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