yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
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I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
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People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
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