I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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