I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize
