Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
babies were throwing up all over the place
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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