Christians are straight up FREAKS
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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