hell yes lets make some ravioli
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
You made out with two different species that night
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
Randomize
