I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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