Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
