My room smells like vodka and shame
Fuck appropriateness.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize