Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
