I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
3pm strippers are depressing
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
