i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
