Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
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