Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Randomize
