I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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