You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
All of them.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Okay so I just had a really great idea
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.