He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer