Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize