How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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