bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
