i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
Randomize
