You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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