I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
