What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Randomize
