you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
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She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
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