doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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