her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
