Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
