I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
