Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
