I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize