Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Randomize
