We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
