you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
I woke up wearing no shirt sleeping next to a half-eaten grilled cheese.
Well did you call the grilled cheese yet? Or r u waiting the usual 3 days?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize