i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
