She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize