and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
