Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
