office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize
