Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
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