No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
You know its a good night when ur woken up by the bartender asking you how he ended up at your house
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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