ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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