i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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