i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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